Einstein's second wife was also his first (and second) cousin, related to him through both of his (already incestuous) parents. Don't worry, they didn't have any children together. At least none known. Maybe there's a hidden child with a monstrous huge brain locked in a closet somewhere to this day, hammering out the Grand Unified Theory as we speak...
Wait a minute...
Are you microchipped?
The same technology that allows you to track your pet when it becomes lost has now been approved for use in you.
What do John Kerry, Dan Quayle, George Bush Jr., Dick Cheney and George Bush Sr. all have in common? Direct ancestors.